Drizzles in the court

Plus.
Today was an awesome day, apart of singing alongside worship leader Philip, screwing up vocals here and there, it was quite a good run I would say. Jenn gave me a tip with my mic handling, which I had totally forgotten about.

I can't help it. Singing about God is something I like to do most.

Christmas runs for the play has started. It's a good experience to feel, because despite the messiness of everyone's daily lives, we can still gather and laugh about ridiculous stuff, like how teletubbies teach you by being deaf, or a donkey lying somewhere in between some script lines. The good ol' times indeed.

But to be honest, I had no clue what was the agenda for today's sermon. I was trying so hard to make sense of what was being preached today, but apparently, it was something like reading Malaysian Standards booklets - really technical stuff...

Sigh.

Basketball today turned out to be quite fun actually. I can see how my game improved quite abit here and there, doing ridiculous layups and 'fake' fouls that got me +80% of the total score. In fact, today's the day I scored shatloads of baskets. Blistering foot, peeling skins... The pain is nothing compared to the satisfaction of a whoosh under the basket.

I've won today. And I will win again next Sunday, and every coming Sundays. But wait, maybe I'll go for captain ball next week instead. My social life dashboard's on the yellow. Quite bad.

And it's another month before Christmas. Time to save up the monies.

Minus.
I can't believe I brought those 'kiddie-game' Tycoon games. Maybe I'm seriously bored to death. Either that, or I need a new hobby.

And the flipping PC shop tricked me. Stupid fineprints that conveniently removes cinematic files. How the heck do you play a game without cinematics? What the hell is it a game in the first place?!

Donkey bollocks......

Is this real life?

Keyphrase: Know your meme....

I cant believe I just spent 4 hours knowing my memes.....

Rip off

I had never imagined, for a person who talks about walking the talk, can fall so bad into the ground with grief and sorrow.

This person had probably taught me what she knew the most about the 'operating' world: how it functions, how it comes and goes about, the good and what nots, etc. I really admire her for her human-driven desires to see things happen, to make good changes to the company she's working for, to make know that despite being in the same office for almost two decades, it is still possible to make better, even though most would have given up.

But alas, in the end, the stronger they are, the harder they fall.

The office offered to train her for a certification course that will benefit the company as a whole, and of course, she took it without question, even though she knew what she was getting to.

Being in charge of alot of things is no easy feat, especially when one is already a belligerent overachiever who takes in what is being handed on. But that's not it. She has people under her, the so-called incompetent 'builder-contractors' who seek her counsel every time they got their pants wet due to errors. I pity the life she has, and often question her about her being. I'm fine, thanks for asking. That was her answer.

What broke her was something really small, just like David's sling, but with a rippling effect. That small problem turned out to be quite a troublesome issue to tackle, which also left alot of work undone. Her course results were in jeopardy. Her teammates were unsupportive. She herself is IT-illiterate. Finally, with no more fuel to burn, she broke down.

I saw her emotions tumble down like Jenga: the very being of her strength and security being taken down bit by bit. I got to learn something important that day too, about multitasking. It made more sense to me now when I recalled Theng Terk's POV about multitasking: You can never give above 100% for both your work, because it is the division of time and effort spent for work.

So far, I had never have problems with multitasking, but then it's probably because I had never been hit anything as hard as what she's going through on Friday. What will I become then, when the same thing hits me?

Pastor Mal nailed it yet again today: sit, stand, and walk.

They sad God is dead, but you're ripping me off.
You can't infect my mind with your vanity.

Reliving the moments....

Too many times I've been thinking, what would it be if I had the opportunity to redo everything, no matter right or wrong:

What would it be like now if I have actually studied hard instead of relying on my leet memorising skillz to remember things?

What if, I had been serious with high school basketball trainings and tournaments instead of loitering round shopping malls and cybercafes?

What would it be like if I had put more effort into studying for that 'coveted' degree class?

What would it be if I think before I act?

Or maybe the proper question is, does it matter?



If I wasn't here tomorrow
Would anybody care
If my time was up I wanna know
You were happy I was there
If I wasn't here tomorrow
Would anyone lose sleep
If I wasn't hard and hollow
Then maybe you would miss me

I know I'm a mess and I wanna be someone
Someone that I like better
I can never forget
So don't remind me of it forever

What if I just pulled myself together
Would it matter at all
What if I just try not to remember
Would it matter at all
All the chances that have passed me by
Would it matter if I gave it one more try
Would it matter at all

If I wasn't here tomorrow
Would anybody care
Still stuck inside this sorrow
I've got nothing and going nowhere

I know I'm a mess and I wanna be someone
Someone that I like better
I can never forget
So don't remind me of it forever

What if I just pulled myself together
Would it matter at all
What if I just try not to remember
Would it matter at all
All the chances that have passed me by
Would it matter if I gave it one more try
Would it matter at all

I know I'm a mess and I wanna be someone
Someone that I like better
Can you help me forget
Don't wanna feel like this forever...forever

What if I just pulled myself together
Would it matter at all
What if I just try not to remember
Would it matter at all
All the chances that have passed me by
Would it matter if I gave it one more try

If I live tomorrow
Would anybody care
Stuck in this sorrow
Going nowhere

All the chances that have passed me by
Would it matter if I gave it one more try
Would it matter at all

"Would It Matter" - Skillet

Direction

Leading a cell group is fun. Getting feedback from your superiors is even better!

Damn I feel so happy when I know I can grow more....

Edit: Now I'm stuck with my current company, coz they've decided to increase my pay...


HAPPY IS ME!!!

3 Days Grace... again?

6 Sept '09 - 9:00AM - 12:30PM

2 years in worship ministry service, I believe this is one of the best time I have ever felt. 4 days before, during practice, Auntie Jo wanted me to lead this guy-song, coz it would sound nice. I like music and noise ever since I was born, probably it's because of the frequent listenings of Guns N' Roses, Marilyn Manson, Def Leopard, Joe Satriani, and other concoctions of hardcore metal combined.

While I do consider some of the fast, upbeat songs that are sung by christian bands less to my liking, the sensation of singing it is no less different from hearing noisy metals. In fact, it felt as though I'm floating above stage, ministering with music. This is something you'd never get from just hearing and listening...

And indeed, I admitted to some people after the service, that I felt kayu la, coz all I did was singing it, but not leading. No jumpy-jumpy or saying any words like "Are you ready for this?!". Not like what A. Jo and the rest of the worship leaders would do.

But who cares? It's administered. It's being received. It's that hot fire inside of you, somewhere deep within the depths of that inner desire of yours, that has made you sing this madly for Him.

Of course, comments came too. Alot of encouragements, and prophesies: the youth liked it alot. I can tell coz it's a fast upbeat song they can relate to easily. Some of the older ones well, it's a new song to them and we all know how that will go la. A particular Auntie Mrs. Wee even told me I would be the next worship leader. Fat chance, I got myself into alot of help for others already so, no thx la.... Not for now :P

I smiled alot that day.

6 Sept '09 - 4:30PM - 9:30PM

As usual, dad drives himself to play mahjong in Kampung Subang, so I am left transport-less for weekly basketball exercise. It's a good warmup for me, so I decided to walk there instead - one hour plus of distance time. Plan was ruined when Daniel spotted me beside the road and picked me up. Not his car, but Sze Jiun's.

Basketball went quite an enjoyment for me. I felt that rush inside to run more, do more stupid stuff, like a raging bull. Won some games, felt happy too.

But sad to say, not all went all. Me lil Pinky finger on the right got hit by a ball, and it broke my finger! SAKIT GILER! It was my second worst experience, after my fractured arm incident when I was small. Lucky me, despite the fact that a trainee-doctor couldn't do much to help with the injury, Mun Keong took me to the nearest hospital. We even took a picture out of it.

The Swelling Fingertip (Notice the protruding bone?)

The hospital did not help much with the pain, considering the fact that I still have to wait in the ER ward for almost 3 hours. Lucky them, years of falling down and being accident-prone had helped build my pain threshold. Finally a specialist had come to check on the injury, and confirmed my case as 'dislocation'.

My first thank you to God, because He preserved my finger so that it did not fracture.

Then comes the treatment: it was a mixture of anaesthetic injection into the finger, followed by a more gentler massage, the Shaolin killer move 'Finger Press' and gash wrappings with an ice-cream stick. The injection itself was quite heart-wrenching. It made my stomach really uncomfortable, as the specialist had to inject it TWICE to get the anaesthetic fluids completely in. First injection was sideways, the seconds on went inward, hitting critical points on most of the fleshy parts of the finger.

The finger of course swelled even more, thanks to the administered shots. A couple of minutes passed after the massage, and finally it was time. Then came the Finger Press, but it did not work as intended. So the specialist gave me a Lv. 9000 Finger Press, and it cracked. Dislocation no more.

Then came the bills. I wanted to claim for insurance, but not until I have paid it firsthand. And it was really expensive. RM 1000. I don't have a credit card, let alone carry that many of an amount in my pocket. Again, Mun Keong came into the picture, with his credit card swiped.

My second thank you to God, because He provided for all my finances in hard times.

Hospital chores finishes. Now it's dinner time. Mun Keong was talking about this really hot saucy Tom Yam place where it's cheap and affordable. Anyone who knows me well would know too, that I would die for a good taste of Tom Yam. And so, just by paying RM9.50 for a delicious Tom Yam at Kuai San SS15, again made my day :D

The rest of the time was all about Settlers of Catan [plus all the brotherhood crap], personal talks [BGR with Mun 'Man' Keong], Ryu's pwnage [in Street Fighter], Dim Sum with the holiday people [ and again, pedobear tendencies.... Stupid Philip =.=" ]

My third thank you to God, because in Him there's always joy and grace abound in abundance.

3-days of MC leaves me with the option to do: hardcore gaming, challenging reads, devotions, prep for Word for Cell, and lots of sleep. I'm gonna attempt to do all of it.

Looking forward to hearing you soon, Work!

Day 16 - 40

The fast is over. With hope, everything that has been set onto, will be set in motion too.

I've been trying very hard to get rid of some old bad habits, and it worked - first, I dont overeat nor finish any leftover food; second, I dont spend so much on food, so more savings for me.

Result: 7kgs of fat loss.

I couldn't believe it when I touched my tummy, it felt flat!

Must aim higher !

Last one... no more breaks...

The greatest lie men created that has something associated with "You complete me" is, you do not get another person in your life to live your life: you share it.